CBeebies

Do the CBeebies schedulers have any idea how randomly irksome the Waybuloos are, when compared to the glories of Iggle Piggle and friends? Drippy, hippy, doe-eyed Waybuloos, with your pastel-coloured, floaty nonsense - I will you past (a 6pm slot?!) while waiting for the true path of The Night Garden.

Ooh, I sound quite curmudgeonly.

-C

Prophecies and floorboards

Okay - so I feel as if my communications to the world are thwarted somewhat. We are living with my parents for a week as our floorboards are sanded and varnished. And at the same time, I'm having technical problems with email, our land line and my mobile. A triple whammy that leaves me with a possible case of Ignoring People Guilt.

In the meantime, who needs a world of electronic intercourse when there is an old-fashioned visionary at my local supermarket? Cup your ear, readers...

My pregnancy is just beginning to show but could still be mistaken for a case of too much cake and pizza. However, a few weeks back, there was really no belly and I was a wearing 'slimming' black mini-dress and black tights. A tall African man at the till in said supermarket made me gasp when he said he knew I was pregnant with a baby boy.

There was no way he could have seen a bump. I could have flounced off and complained to the manager at such a comment. Yet he told me he was a preacher in 'his own country' and has the 'gift of prophecy.' I was so amazed, I found no real reason to doubt him. Cue spooky music and save the blue bootees.

-C

We're very happy...

...to be expecting a second baby in March 2010.

-C

Just s'not fair.., (sorry)

Why is it, when your baby has a runny nose that leaves his top lip like a melting glacier, he does not thank you for wiping it clean? Nay, he protests as if you are merely trying to compound any misery with your motherly brandishing of tissue, your eager pursuit of dry, soft skin.

-C

New Hoose

So, where were we? I'm writing this with eyes tingling from onion fumes. We've had the rooms of our new house painted and a friend suggested cutting up an onion in a bowl of water to absorb the chemical waft of new paint. Now the house smells like a giant onion. I may abandon the experiment.

Carpets are the next big frontier. I'm sure the dog and cat who lived here before us were lovely creatures - animal pensioners, if you will, but they also left half their fur in the shag pile. I am phoning men with sanding machines and hoping for golden floorboards. Patience...it shall be worth it.

-C