Well, as you can see, I rarely post any more and if there are any readers left, they may be wondering what has happened to me. I am telling myself that this not-writing is a good thing for now. It is just a sign that my life is so full, that I am well, and that looking after our two beloved children is my calling.
When I just had Hugh, I could post when he napped, but now, with Tess (almost 1) it's pretty much a 12-14 hour day and in those last two hours of the day, when the kids are in peaceful sleep, I just want....well, I just want to relax. I surf the net, watch TV, read, chat, or whatever. Usually I want input and not more output.
So I'm going to lurk until the next chapter comes along. I feel amazingly lucky to have made such a shocking recovery after twenty years of severe illness. Twenty years. It never ceases to amaze me. One day I hope to write more on that. For now I am just enjoying the everyday and feeding my soul with a life that I thought I'd never have. I'd love if there were others who could surprise themselves too. It's never too late for hope.
-C
6 comments:
It is shocking, C, but in a good way. Truly wonderful. No wonder you savour every day. Still, I don't think people give up hope, we all have different staminas and responses and we do what works for us, though I know some remain hideously ill with no let up. I think, as you say, there is luck too, as well as genes, playing a part. I got my book written by pushing way beyond limits - but I suffered for that, was it worth it, yes, could I go through it again, no!
What a lovely post
X
Sounds lovely :-))
Hello, and yes I agree with you. I'm only managing to truly appreciate my children after almost 6 years of it all being one big struggle. I like the idea of input not output. i need to learn from that.
jolene
xx
Hi Ciara
I haven't commented here for a long time, but I too have been so happy for you and so astonished that you have made such a recovery and have two children now, and the part you wrote about feeding your soul "with a life that I thought I'd never have" brought me to tears. It does give me hope - I am bed bound, aged 35, after 20 years of illness,have developed various various complications, and often hope feels in short supply. Sometimes I find myself thinking, "was Ciara still severely ill at my age? Is there still time for a miraculous recovery?"!
All I can say is that your story IS a kind of miracle to me and I am very, very happy for you. Enjoy it. I know you know how incredibly precious this level of normality is.
And from the photos you've posted earlier, the children look gorgeous.
Take care,
Amy
Oh Amy,
what a kind and touching comment. It makes me want to blog more and to try and help in any way I can. It is late tonight, but I will post again in reply soon.
-C
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