Recently, I watched Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse with Hugh. Spoiler, there are lots of Spidermen. And even a Spider-woman. It was great film, actually. I surprised myself.
In a tense escape, one Spiderman tries to pass on wisdom to a younger Spiderman. He says,
Let Go! Be in the moment!
The young Spiderman yells back-
I am in the moment! It's a TERRIBLE moment!
In my head, things are back to where they were in March. I would enjoy watching a film or TV programme, and when it was over, I felt the sad rush of remembering the pandemic. It would hit me in the solar plexus, a kind of semi-grief.
But we could hide from the virus in lockdown. We are lucky enough not to have key-worker jobs, interacting with the public.
Now, I wake at 6am with the dread. The virus IS in my son's school. One case and counting. It's in my nieces's school nearby, and a handful of local schools.
Everybody KNOWS that kids and teenagers are rubbish at social distancing. They're just kids and teenagers. It's not their fault.
This is the reality. I know I can't spend hours worrying about it, looking into 'the abyss' of Covid; and whoops, there's another wee abyss called the Climate Emergency.
This helps nobody. So, I need to try to learn to use the distracted moments as stepping stones. To 'float forward'.
The white paws are my comfort. In the half-light of the night time kitchen, I rub them like worry dolls, like 'lucky' rabbit feet.
It sure feels like autumn. Like no other autumn we have known. Float forward, if you can -I know it sounds like a new-age hippy line- one moment at a time.
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